Self-portrait

I read an online article some time ago, one of those about self-discovery, become a better person kind of thing, there was a list of about 20 things to do to discover yourself.  I remember this sentence well – let go of the need to be loved by all.

I can’t remember anything else, just this sentence stuck with me.  And ever since that day I have told myself this a few times.  Just like I don’t love or like everyone out there, I guess it is quite a natural and normal thing that I won’t be liked or loved by everyone I meet or interact with.

So just let go of the need to be loved by all! Period.

Great now that I’ve told myself that…let me talk about my painting.  I finished this one some time ago and never posted it because I just thought it was not good enough. It’s all wrong and she does not look like me.  Enter me saying – whatever possibly rolling my eyes!! 

IMG_6296

This was a huge step forward for me, to paint a self-portrait. It was a good learning too, both in art and internally for myself and my insecurities. It’s time to just share it.

I’m so glad I painted it, I’m also surprised I finished it.

Collection of quotes I love, old blog posts of mine about my boys and some bible verses, and things the boys say

Collection of quotes I love, old blog posts of mine about my boys and some bible verses, and things the boys say

Putting some detail down, my drawing

Putting some detail down, my drawing

This is a science you know, making sure the drawing is correct the lines where your lip ends and middle of the eye…checking all the time that the proportions and distances are right

This is a science you know, making sure the drawing is correct the lines where your lip ends and middle of the eye…checking all the time that the proportions and distances are right

Completed self portrait

Completed self-portrait

This was the first, probably not the last time, I don’t know…..although I am not 100% happy with the result, I am 100% happy I did this. I learned so much through this process, the painting is signed so technically it is finished, but it does not mean I can’t try to fix the things I’m unhappy about. For now it will have to do ♥

Sharing my ‘selfie’

I don’t normally do this… SHARING

When I’m painting I don’t share my progress on FB or with anyone else, except the people in art class, no one really sees what’s going on and how I’m coming along. Until the last day when I finally sign the painting, only then do I post a pic on FB or blog about it.  But this one is a bit different. I though I was crazy to even attempt it, but the idea had been on mind for so long. I forgot about it and then this year decided this is it I’m going to do a self-portrait!!

So it’s a little different from the conventional self portraits, my one involves a bit of mixed media and it started with sticking pieces of paper with quotes and words.

This is what I had to work with…something I found and I immediately fell in love with this pic. I just didn’t want to paint her

094

So in came ‘me’ and the pieces of paper are quotes that I just love and resonate with, words that have special meaning and somehow affect me and appeal to me. Some of them in a personal or emotional way.
089

Some pieces are from old blogs posts (the ones about my boys) and then the titles are a mix of things special to me. Little bit of tearing here and there and they were all randomly glued down
092

and then came the drawing….this was hard!! And not my favorite part. But it had to be as perfect as possible, at least in the size of eyes and distance of eyes, nose and mouth etc. It’s quite complicated and a bit of a ‘science’
138

…and there you have it! Now for the painting and the continued tweaking and science behind the distance of all things facial 🙂 I have definitely learned a few interesting things…Like did you know that the distance between your eyes (middle of your face) or the bridge of the nose is the same size in centimeters as the size of your eyes? (not sure if I’m explaining it correctly) but anyway I have started painting and hope to finish my selfie soon. Hope it looks like me when I’m done!

And so here is my first layer of color. Will share the final painting as soon as it’s done

142

 

 

 

 

Old selfie, old portrait

beautiful self portrait (Minnette Vari) cannot go un-noticed

beautiful self-portrait (Minnette Vari) cannot go un-noticed

I was lucky yesterday. I managed to get away from my desk for an hour and went on a guided walk-about of a new art exhibition! Again I was blown away by the beautiful art works and the knowledge of the curator in this gallery. How do people remember all these dates, names and history facts? I kept telling myself that I better start reading some of the art books I have collected over the years…there is so much to learn, so much I don’t know.

Maquette for statue of Jan Smuts

Maquette for statue of Jan Smuts

This exhibition entitled from “From Sitting to Selfie” is absolutely the most ingenious exhibition I have seen, it’s divided into four periods for this display. Now you can’t divide years of art into four or any other number and you can’t put so many years of art in one exhibition even if the title is portraits there is just tooo much. But this was very cleverly put together into four sections/periods in art history.

Go back to 1600s before cameras – Baroque and Romanticism. They sat for hours or days for a portrait. Only royalty or the very rich had portraits done. Masters left us with Realistic and Truthful and Accurate paintings perfectly capturing the resemblance on the portrait.

 

something to admire...these were painted in 1617

something to admire…these were painted in 1617

And then cameras were invented, late 1800s or early 1900s and paintings changed a bit. From the realistic portrait to beautiful modernism and impressionism and cubism – art works that for me offer a bit more thought…these are the pieces that you need to admire from a distance. My favorites are these, all the art eras of the ism’s.  Food for thought and little more character and personality. The portraits had their own disposition, some were odd and eccentric. Makes me think that artists in this time were all rebellious and a bit nutty. But I love that about them….

 

Portrait of Annie Mavata, you have to see this real life, she is almost ready to talk to you. Love this painting, it is incredibly beautiful

Portrait of Annie Mavata, you have to see this in real life, she is almost ready to talk to you. Love this painting, it is incredibly beautiful.  I you look away and then back at her quickly it looks like she has moved her hand, just amazing

Jan Smuts - reminder of history class when I was in school and paid little attention, only now I'm interested in history. This is one of my favorite paintings there...

Jan Smuts – reminder of history class when I was in school and paid little attention, only now I’m interested in history. This is one of my favorite paintings there…

And then postmodernism was born…in the 20th century, interesting but not my favourite time in art. This is like the one chapter in the school book that I would skip and just look at the pretty pictures.  Maybe one day I will change my mind about this and understand it a little better. Still I found some really beautiful pieces, that had me staring for a while.

Reshada Crouse painting (1994) so much to talk about in this painting, so many stories to tell...

Reshada Crouse painting (1994) so much to talk about in this painting, so many stories to tell…

Enter the selfie and digital era, the era where we snap and happily share and print every moment of our lives. Internet changed the world for ever and changed the way we do things. A lot of our private moments have become quite public. It is fast and quick and it has moved from a gallery and photo frame to cyber space. Everything is different, it’s lifelike or totally unrealistic. Experimentation, revelation and exposure.

smoke portraits (2005) painting with smoke, unbelievable

smoke portraits (2005) painting with smoke, unbelievable

I’m not sure this is the best era, and I’m not sure I like this one either.  I want to go back to the 1900s and admire Picasso, Matisse, Monet, Renoir, Pissarro, Cassatt, Morisot, Degas, Van Gogh and Gauguin….

 

"Queen of Hearts" oil and gold leaf (1860) photo does not do it justice

“Queen of Hearts” oil and gold leaf (1860) my photo does not do it justice

…that is where I draw my inspiration from 😉